Letter from Ram Dass

Ram Dass wrote a letter some years ago to a family who
had lost their young daughter, Rachel. Although he
wrote it to these two parents specifically, everything in
this letter applies to anyone who has lost a child.

Dear Steve and Anita,

Rachel finished her work on earth, and left the stage in a
manner that leaves those of us left behind with a cry of
agony in our hearts, as the fragile thread of our faith is
dealt with so violently. Is anyone strong enough to stay
conscious through such teaching as you are receiving?
Probably very few. And even they would only have a
whisper of equanimity and peace amidst the screaming
trumpets of their rage, grief, horror, and desolation.

I can't assuage your pain with any words, nor should I.
For your pain is Rachel's legacy to you. Not that she or
I would inflict such pain on you by choice, but there it
is. And it must burn it's purifying way to completion.
For something in you dies when you bear the unbearable,
and it is only in that dark night of the soul that you are
prepared to see as God sees, to love as God loves.

Now is the time to let your grief find expression. No
false strength. Now is the time to sit quietly and speak
to Rachel, and thank her for being here with you these
few years, and encourage her to go on with whatever
her work is, knowing that you will grow in compassion
and wisdom from this experience. In my heart, I know
that you and she will meet again and again, and recognize
the many ways in which you have known each other.
And when you meet you will know, in a flash, what now
it is not given to you to know: Why this had to be the
way is was.

Our rational minds can never understand what has
happened, but our hearts - if we can keep them open
to God - will find their own intuitive way. Rachel came
through you to do her work on earth, which includes her
manner of death. Now her soul is free, and the love that
you share with her is invulnerable to the winds of
changing time and space.

In that deep love, include me.

In love,
Ram Dass